Xplore CrossFit

 

The champs

 

You might have guessed it although you may not believe it. The winners of the paleo party are Erin Clancy and The Boss. It was just too close to call so we are splitting the pot. Great job to everyone who played. So what if it took me three weeks to announce the winners. It was totally worth the painful six weeks. You may have lost a few pounds, and possibly a few friends with your weird diet but you came out the other end a better person. I know I did. It only lasted a few days but for almost a week I was a gentler human being. 

The finale

So it is extremely late in coming but here is the day 2 wrap up from the sectional qualifiers. The day started off with 5rm deadlift with iron plates on a hard platform pulling from a deficit because the foot platform was ½ an inch higher than the where the bar sat. Most of the folks at XCF have lifted with iron at least once but if you have only power lifted with bumpers than you are missing quite a treat when robbed of the recoil on the successive pulls. The energy of competition did a great deal to overcome the obstacle though. Our own boys both PR’d pulling up 350 pounds for five reps. I left it all on the platform and PR’d as well. Irvine went into day 2 in 7^th place because of his weak ass 2xBW 5rm deadlift he dropped down to the high teens. The fifth workout was a triplet involving weighted sled pushes across a concrete floor, 18 double unders, and  4 muscle ups, five rounds for time.. Only 18 double unders per round? Weak sauce! At least that is what everyone thought, but after a few sets of sled pushes 18 double unders felt like the last 20 in a set of 100. Rob went into the workout with reservations because he couldn’t get a single muscle up in practice. He considered scaling the workout right up until the start but he went for it as prescribed. He set the lofty goal of getting 1 muscle up. He shocked the world with NINE! It was amazing. He actually did 11 but he got called on a few reps. It was outstanding. Irvine and I went side by side in the second workout. I was crushed from the deadlift so I didn’t have much in me. Irvine was itching for a top 20 finish and was gunning to crush this workout. He was lightning out of the gate was in a dead heat for first place in that workout. In the last round a monster named Mason came from behind and edged him out by a few seconds. He did the workout in less than 9 minutes. At the end of the day some of the other freaks pull a sub 8 but my boys did me proud for sure. 

Check out the results here.
 

Day 1

Day 1 of the sectional qualifiers is complete. In short it was awful. When looked at retrospectively it was amazing. It is a rare gathering of enthusiastic masochists and it must be experienced to be fully understood. If you have shared CrossFit with more than 1 person you have been asked the question "but why would you do that?" It is tough to explain why. In the same vein it is tough to explain the true nature of a CrossFit competition. It is just..._______(choose the qualifier). Instead of a group workout of ten there is two hundred. Every single person in the room is going to the well and back every single workout. Standards are not encouraged, they are enforced. You want to crush every person around you and at the same time you want everyone to smash the workout. I was reprimanded for coaching athletes that weren't even mine. In the final workout I gave an athlete a tip that allowed him to beat me by 6 reps and come in first place. You get to see people from all over the state that you don't get to see because we are all busy helping people to pursue elite fitness at the same times on the same days almost all year long. It is like a family reunion complete with the emotional and physical discomfort. XCF represented well. Irvine is going into day two in the top ten and Rob is sitting at 85th in a field of 114 strong men. Tomorrow's first event is a 5rm deadlift with iron plates on a hard platform. NO BOUNCING! Aren't you blown away that we did iron plate deads recently. Your training staff might be a braintrust of geniuses. I am only a little excited about tomorrow. Thanks for the encouraging text and voicemails today. 

Olympics? psshhht

The time is finally upon us. I know you guys have been as psyched as I have. CROSSFIT COMPETITION SEASON. Who cares who won the Super Bowl. It is time for legit fitness testing. Apollo can beat me at one thing and one thing only. I bet CrossFitters can even read faster than average joes. Anyhow the Washington State sectional is this weekend. Here is a link to the event details in case you had a desire to root for the four XCF folks who will be competing. 

Triple extension

Everyone's favorite quality of functional movements has to be universal motor recruitment patterns. Along with being the 7th coolest phrase on the planet. Two of the six even more awesome phrases include "definitive femininity" and "universally accepted unifying archetypes" both of which will be discussed in a future post. Universal motor recruitment patterns refer to the intrinsic patterns human follow in general locomotion. The reason we love movements that fall under this umbrella is because your brain learns stuff and then it has a crappy time unlearning stuff so it is great if the stuff you learn works for you in lots of situations. The olympic lifts create momentum and elevation on an object from an explosion of the hips. In the biz we call this jumping. "Jumping you say?" Why yes, I did say jumping. Jumping is a natural, elemental human movement that we can train with incredible loads to become fast and strong while still training the mind to respond in a coordinated fashion when explosiveness is called for. I can try train leg extensions, leg curls, and glute kick-backs all day and never develop a proficient capacity for the effort required in a jump. Check out Ali and Blaze performing separate movements that both require a vicious extension of the ankles, knees, and hips. Granny throws, and cleans have little in common at first glance but we can see those wonderful universal motor recruitment patterns at work. It really brings a tear to my eye.

 

It sucks sometimes

 I don't fully understand people who tell me that CrossFit is too hard. It can't be harder than dealing with the effects of not doing it. Whether it is weak, slow, soft, or sick, all of these conditions when faced day after day have to be harder than a constantly varied, high intensity, functional exercise regimen. The workout sucks for a little while and then it is over. Weakness sucks 24/7. I think what makes people say that CrossFit is too hard is a failure on my part to convey what CrossFit is. Most people see what we do as a workout until you blackout, and repeat for time. Sometimes it may feel like that, but is it anything more than training not to suck at everything else? When you get a little stronger, faster, and more flexible, the demands of life seem mute in comparison. 

 

It's like a poop sandwich on a brioche roll

So it is my week of green things. I am in love with my Vita-Mix and there is no end to the bliss, or the chaos that it is capable of producing. The first week of ownership is a magical experience in which you find yourself continually captivated by the fact that it will blend anything. The next month or so you wade through the quagmire of bad smoothies, soups, and GI bleeds that are a result of the aforementioned fact that the vita-mix is able to blend ANYTHING. E and I have started to hone our craft. She leans toward delicious drinks full of fruit and I find myself choking down nutrient rich "fuel" for quasi-elite machine I call my body. This morning I outdid myself with a spinach, broccoli, and pear concoction. I was in a hurry so I thought to myself two raw eggs should add a touch of class and protein to this already magical mixture. I was magnificently misinformed and was forced to clutch the edge of the sink on numerous occasions in an effort to keep the liquid energy from re-emerging. Lucky for me I made enough to go with a couple of meal so when I came home for lunch another serving was awaiting me. I thought to myself that maybe if I put it in a fancy wine glass that would add an air of civility to this alimentary atrocity. (E will be pleased that another one of our wedding gifts was getting put to use.) I can assure you that the glass did me no favors but sans the raw eggs the drink was only mostly terrible. 6 more days of green and I plan to keep you abreast of the painful developments as they unfold. My hope is that much like our paleo challenge there will be diamonds in the rough that will push us all further along the path of elite athleticism.

 

Schedule Update

 There will be only 1 class on Monday, February 15. It will be at 11. It will be awful. If you are looking for something awful to do on President's Day then come to the gym. If you are looking for something fun go to the Lunchbox Laboratory in Ballard and eat a cheeseburger. I recommend the dork. 

Hooray! It's over-ish

 

We finally have come to the end of six straight weeks of paleo fun. Tuesday is picture day. I am psyched to see what kind of physical changes people experienced. I am also keen to know what kinds of things happened to you that can't be seen in a photo. I have heard many great reports already but I am keen to hear what else has happened to people. I hope this isn't the absolute end for many of you. There are certainly some elements that just don't make sense in your life or they aren't worth the trouble it causes but I believe there is much that can be sustained. I hope that the results are encouragement enough to sustain most of the principles of the diet. I am sure many of you have been dreaming about pizza but I encourage you to ease in. You remember pizza being a much more pleasant experience because you didn't have the good feelings of paleo to compare it to. I heard from a lot of folks that paleo didn't make them feel any different. I would wager that for many the change was so gradual over the course of six weeks that you didn't notice but once you dive headfirst off the wagon into a bucket of fries you will soon have a stark contrast in general well being to compare it to. Thanks to everyone who participated and I will let you know who our champion is soon.

Dorsi-what?!

Best workout video ever. It is so incredible it doesn't even warrant a soundtrack. In fact the live audio was too intense so we took it off. Enjoy.